Month ending is fast expediting, GEE! What a rhyme! So, I don’t want to stick in the mud and since it’s a love month, it is ethically right to bounce off about this so called love - thing.
Love makes the world go round. Be it a chronic shape-shifter; romantic love, kindred-spirit love, familial love, brotherly/sisterly love, BFF love, mentor-mentee love, pet/pet-owner love, love as a metaphor vs. love as a (usually inconvenient) reality. As I always wanted, again this time, I’m on the side of a romantic love.
Every person is capable of great love. The idea of love that is fueled by childhood fantasies is really rare as it is only seen on movies and in once upon a time stories. Reality is what we are embracing. Not all love affairs succeed.
I have a story wherein I want to pass out. OK, there was a girl who was veraciously in love with his long time boyfriend; they were in a relationship for about 6 years or so. Lasting that long is quite a feat these days. The girl was 5 years younger than the man, after this woman had finished her college degree, the man told her girlfriend not to go out and look for work, so the submissive woman followed what his boyfriend wanted, she stayed at home while his boyfriend works for living. Relationship involves a lot of give and take and compromise. But, the pact they have made when it comes to finding a work doesn’t substantiate the reason why. Now the end justifies the means coz early in their intimacy, some were against on it. They still went through struggles with love because they have witnessed themselves holding on to it in a capacity that they want to be holding on to it. Now that they went separate paths, it’s not only the LOVE that has been wasted; it is SO much with the time. The chance to explore and the right to freedom have not been rendered. Consciously or not, jealousy or blinding has been seized. Well, there could be reason why their relationship came to an end. Maybe, a monotonous stage was introduced on their binding. So to begin with, the guy looked for another girl, to stress the fact enough; he met a very young girl, a high school maiden. The guy started to feel a need for someone more spontaneous maybe. At first, who would have thought that something’s going on? That this bachelor would do unfathomable behavior when it comes to flirting? In regards to flirtation, cheating includes any involvement, physical or otherwise, outside of the relationship. So that includes flirtation, textations and other GRAY areas. So what to do with these gray areas? Define them. Yes, the girlfriend decanted the grays into separate blacks and whites. She told her guy the things she has found out, alas! The boyfriend admitted his wrong doings; he told her girlfriend that it was true; he’s with the young girl, that they went on dating, that the guy will leave his high school lady when she will graduate in high school. How stupid it was! I even got mad when I heard this very shallow – nonsensical - reason. What the hell he was thinking? He’s utterly or obviously senseless, how silly the guy is! This setting is really unfair, why can’t he just leave the girl and why was there a condition? Sometimes, the reason maybe he can’t spit her out is because, the other side won't let him. Or else there seem to have a wall around his mind against the situation.
Other times, he’s just an ass. A bad ass.While the ineffectual girlfriend has many chances to clarify her role into the guy’s life, most of the time she'll just tell the heroes to figure it out. In our own term,”bahala na si batman”. When there is an attack of the flowery words, some would easily rely on it, off course, it has something to do with one style or probably coping skills that’s why the girlfriend believed him.
But then, some people regardless of gender face conflicts and difficulties, they head on and try to find solutions to their problems. But this man would run away from it while others are oblivious that these problems even exits. Finally, the woman came out from her shell and decided to break up with his boyfriend. She can no longer deal with a cheater, and that’s the dauntless move. We never know what will really happen, if this guy would go back to his senses or will always love to play and stay with the kid (pertaining to the high school gal) or maybe he’s just having fun.
It’s not a simple black and white solution is it?
You shouldn’t waste your time for someone who doesn’t care. Love is complicated and not all the easy, I know that. I’ve been on both sides of heartbreak—as I’m sure is the case for most people. It really sucks. True. But it can’t stand in your way, it can’t block you; we can’t allow our past heartbreaks to sully our future potentials—we just can’t! Even if that does seem like the only option sometimes, we mustn’t allow the failures of our past to blind us from the possibilities of our present. We don’t want to get hurt again, so maybe we should just block out romantic love, turn our backs on it since it so harshly has turned its back on us before. But I ask you this: what is the point in that?
It’s like the surfer shark-attack victims; when asked if they plan on ever getting back up on the board, most of those people respond with an excited affirmative. Outsiders look on in question, but the surfers continue to explain that the reasons they were out in the water up on that board in the first place haven’t gone anywhere. Maybe they’ll alter their routine a bit, or take more precautions then they had in the past, but they’re still going to continue to grab their board and hit those waves.
I’m not a heart doctor, but for daintiness’ sake, apply common sense! And it is commonly referred as a sense of propriety or how to behave rightly in all circumstances. The word is DELIKADESA
In love, we need to be embraced for who we are. Generally speaking, we don’t need (or typically even want) to be viewed as perfect, quite the opposite; we want and need to be accepted and embraced for being perfectly imperfect human beings. We want and need to be loved for who we really are, not for who we can pretend to be.
Just something to think about:
If you can find someone who can see you in the light of your own actual identity and still want to be a constant presence of any dynamic in your world, well—many congratulations to you, dear one, for you are loved.
-dyoyzee-
No comments:
Post a Comment