KEEP THE MUSIC PLAYING

In this so called life, it’s amazing when you can feel your life going somewhere.
Like your life just figured out how to get good, like, that second -- and it goes like that and things become better on the horizon. I have to say that one of my major passions in life is music and its powerful sound can affect our emotions. I really have this play in mind and mostly magical thinking on my mp3 list, playing them in endless loops and singing along as if in prayer. Consequently, it helps us to enjoy our lives with different kinds of music. Seriously, it blows me away, and somehow a message with a melody becomes a kind of holy truth in it. I would play songs that had steered me through tearful breakups, happy moments in life and just the normal days.  

 MUSIC and LIFE run parallel and it describes MY LIFE in many ways. It is one of the few things that are constant to me. My life without melodies and harmonies would be totally empty. I think it is like the memoirs to my life as it has been there throughout everything with me. The rhythm and so with the lyrics inspires me everyday. I believe music has the ability to convey all sorts of emotion. Whether the emotion is joy and happiness or sadness and despair through rhythms, harmonies and the lyrics music shows it. I just realized, I have already written a blog about my passion to music before. So what really made me come up with this kind of topic? It’s all because of my dad’s genre of music. Papa is a stereo- head. He listens to all the classic country and blues guitar legends. In short, I think his love for music while I was a kid influenced me to love and appreciate music in all forms. It seems, it is his need in order to get through his daily life. His taste to music is all Frank Sinatra, Abba, The Carpenters, Michael Learns to rock, Perry Como, Tom Jones, and so on and so forth. 

Mama loves sweet and romantic OPM songs. One time, I was on my verge to go to sleep then all of a sudden, mama played a song on her phone. It made me smile because the song was juvenile and it’s a teenybopper song. Anyways, there’s nothing wrong about it. That’s my mama! Her taste of music is cool! Since she plays a bunch of love songs on her list, it makes me stomp my feet on the floor or just tap my hand on my pillow until I fall asleep; and sometimes as I listen still,  it fills my heart  with joy and  it also gives me goose bumps. The effect that music can have on our emotions is tremendous, as it can bring people to floods of tears or bursts of laughter.  Like a time machine, you can paint a picture while listening to a song. It has the ability to wander our thinking and imaginations. Admiring music in this way is a lot like admiring the sun when it rise  and when it sets, the shapes we form in the clouds, the chirping of birds early in the morning. It is beautiful, but at the same time very scientific, based on patterns.  Enough rambling about it.

Throughout my life, music has always been a major influence. Well, everybody lives on music. We breathe every word and we dwell at every melody. It’s the one thing in my life that makes sense and is a huge part of my life. Music is, and always will be my life; my soul, my greatest achievement, and my passion. I want to end this again by saying that MUSIC is indeed the language of the soul. And what the soul feels, only music can translate.

-dyoyzee-

FLAWS & ALL

It feels summer although it’s rainy season already! Sure, the sun is hot - it just leaves me in darkness way too early. It happens at times that people take me for a boy, and I must say, I don’t dress feminine and I'm more on Tees and shorts. Being 5’ 5” tall and with manly gestures probably has something to do with it too.  But it happens every seldom and most of the time it's manifested in some stranger saying ''excuse me sir'', “boss”, in my native language, “manong”, in Filipino language, “kuya”.

The other day I went over to my nephew’s room and I was watching him playing on his PSP, all of a sudden he looks up at me and says:"Are you a girl?" A little taken aback by the question, I nodded, laughed a little and say."Yes, of course I am a girl; I am your tita" Gian looks at me, wobbling on his stature, just to fire off the next question. "Are you in love with a boy?" (I am very out to my family, and they have all met my ex on several occasions) Even more flustered I have to tell him "No" after I have answered him he looks at me, nods, and then he announces. "You are in love with a girl" Well, I am happy we established that, I am not a boy and I am not in love with a boy, and I guess I should be happy that my nephew, at his early age, could catch up things so easily. 

 

 It’s the first day of October and I feel gloomy. So here I am, writing my first article in October. Right now, I love the song Marilyn Monroe by Nicki Minaj, I am not a Nick fan but this song caught my attention.  I am not perfect and I am far from being one. I understand that, but I just want people to love me and accept me unconditionally.  I am flawed; I worry about everything. I believe in taking calculated risk in life, loving more than think you can, hanging on a second longer than the moment you want to let go, and smiling when it hurts. Point out my flaws. I know I have them and so with my girl. So my  girlfriend have these days where I don’t know why she’s being  upset, down, depressed, angry, irritated, frustrated, and could change moods really quick. Sometimes, she gets angry over things that really shouldn’t matter at all and I hope she noticed that I am THE ONE who will understand her flaws. At first I am hesitant to tell her and drill it to her about it, but now, I am no longer afraid to tell her so. I just don’t want her to feel that I am putting her back in my place and by that I don’t mean to degrade her.  I look at her equally as myself. I hope she feels that I always put her side in my shoe and I already accepted her as for what she is. I actually take the time to listen to some uncomfortable, difficult feeling like guilt or anger or unworthiness she tells.  I’ve noticed that there seems to be this hazy area between what is considered hating on a character versus discussing flaws. I think there’s a difference, but the term “hate” seems to just get thrown around left and right. The flaws have some sort of reasoning. Hate disregards reasoning. AND I am trying to shelter her from this harshness of this world.  The ways I express and explain to her are not always the best. And as partners, there are struggles with it. I think it’s clear to see that people were going to get hurt, and we are included. We all deal with the feelings of being flawed or not good enough, at times. Just to sum it all, it is love and acceptance where we can understand where that comes from and acknowledge that anyone who has been through it. I just take her with kindness and compassion. I know everybody has its flaws. We just have to learn to love and accept it. When we love our flaws we create an environment where we’re either able to make the kinds of specific changes we truly want. All of these things, in my own experience, are much easier said than done. And, when we’re able to tell the truth, express our real emotions, forgive ourselves, appreciate our flaws, and bring love to all aspects of our lives (both light and dark), we give ourselves the opportunity to transcend our flaws in a real way.

It was a complex position that was bound to hurt people. Life isn’t easy and it is full of curve balls, potholes, and seemingly endless inclines. It wouldn’t be life otherwise. Live it. Don’t fear it. Enjoy it. Don’t waste it. This life is what we make it. No matter what, we are going to mess up sometimes, and it’s a universal truth. But the good part is we get to decide how we’re going to mess it up. Just because when we failed once, it doesn’t mean we will fail at everything. Keep trying, hold on, and always believe in ourselves because if we don’t, then who will? All the pain, the fear and the crap maybe going through all that and it is what keeping us moving forward. It’s what pushes us. Maybe we have to get a little messed up before we can step up. So keep your head high, keep your chin up, and most importantly, keep smiling, because life’s a beautiful thing and there’s so much to smile about.

-dyoyzee-