BACK WITH MY ETCHETERAS

When my daily life and relationships began to bend under the weight of my poorly prioritized choices, I just stopped blogging all together. As a blogger myself, I often find stopping; to breathe is incredibly important – to prove this, I’m pretty much too off April but getting back into the writing routine in this month of May felt even better.  I have been BUSY lately! I haven’t had the time to post on my blog, so sadly it has been neglected, but everything has been going well.

I pondered one dark afternoon, as I sat comfortably outside our “bahay kubo”, tried to get a nap but unluckily, didn’t have one. “What is the point of life, when we come to the end?” I wondered. I mean, when I look around, I see a lot of struggling—in my own life and in the lives of others. It seems like, even though there’s an abundance of goodness in our lives, the prevalent theme seems to be this struggle to find balance, peace and happiness. I looked away towards our street to avoid my distracting neighbor who put into volume his favorite song “Pusong bato”. I wish I have worn my headset back then. He was no longer in my peripheral as I reflected my own experiences —particularly my own “blind” chase towards a more promising tomorrow. Life is a game. It’s either when you play, you win or lose sometimes. We stride through life as if we will live forever. We treat time as a cheap commodity that we blindly waste. We become consumed by negativity. We hide behind victim stories. There’s no end to the madness of chasing.

Sometimes you just have to stop taking life so seriously and just learn to laugh it off.  Oh my God, looks like I am thinking way too hard about this “Life” stuff. The more I analyze the more intricate and complex the world is going to get for me. At the end of the day, life is about happiness. What makes us happy is deeply personal and different for everyone. It’s a constant struggle to balance being content (happy) with wanting to better yourself and accomplish something meaningful. The latter could eventually make you happy, but requires you to be in a state of discontent with your life or the world (unhappy). To me, it’s the ultimate paradox that I’m still trying to figure out. If we continue to seek out what we think will make us happy and do what we want; will we ever succeed in finding complete satisfaction? Is it better to be content with your circumstances in life?

I haven’t completely resolved this, but I try to:

1) Savor the present,

 2) Be content, with which I am,

3) know what matters to me,

4) Decide what to do in life based on what matters to me,

and

5) Put my all into THAT without being attached to the outcome of my efforts.

I wish people will realized more about life while they are young. I wish people will enjoy the life given to them and realized of how grateful of the blessings they have. People now are super blinded of worldly things and life. While we are on the earth just learn to live and to give, I think that is life, sharing is the most important for we to have a life.

We all make our own meanings, rules and create our own purpose in life. Mine is to experience joy, enjoy life and be loving and kind. Everything else is just speculation. Count your blessings. Sometimes, the evil one creeps into our lives silently and slowly. Just strengthen your faith and keep praying. Once in a while a breather is needed and being silent is a great option to meditate and focus on the good things brought by life. Love is the ONLY important thing in life. Less thinking, more flowing. Wash, Rinse and Repeat until the day God takes your life away. Hope that simplifies things.

So when I'm done with  my “Marlboro”,  I found myself singing “Pusong bato” and laughed  myself out loud  after, I know I gave in and it is just okay. By the way, I always hear that song every now and then in public. Well, I now truly understand that life can only have a meaning once we cease looking for it. As always, the choice is yours. Enjoy!!!

-dyoyzee-