aLOnE

I have known loneliness in the midst of a crowd of strangers and friends alike. It's a feeling that creeps into me even when I'm with the person I hold most important to. Loneliness leaves some memories that befriend some hopeful dreams I have. For a time, loneliness has been my sole companion. Loneliness...are you a friend or a foe? Are you with child of wisdom or my destruction it is that you seek? Why is happiness so evasive? Or has my heart become incapable of sowing its own joys. Is happiness a grace? A state of mind? An idealism or reality?

While I know that life cannot be all roses and thorns and thorns are necessary to further give meaning to its beauty, but still, why do life bring more rain than the warmth of the sun?

While my hopes hangs on the highest ideals and believe that the world abounds with reasons enough for events to be explained, why can't I have the simplest desire for a peaceful heart? Isn't in peace that people find consolation after seeing the tumultuous disparities in the world, the dreams that never came to be?

Yes, it is in peace that somehow the heart can be contented despite the scars? But I'm all wounds and the injuries go deeper. Why does man have to suffer? Loneliness, have you come to bring me closer to my faith or my doom? What do you have for me that may prune me...or you're a dagger for my soul?

My existence is filled with bitter-sweet memories, though I wasn't totally deprived of joy. But joy, as i have known it, rarely touches me...Oh, what should i do with thes troubled heart? I am carrying a heavy load with the feeling of guilt and emptiness. And I am running out of courage to face life. Should I?

Loneliness is a blank look in the face...a sad hello...a grief behind the smile...a pretended bravado in the eyes. It is the sting in my bosom, an eclipse hiding much of desires.Perhaps, it's a grace , or maybe a villain. For how long will I keep the heavy block? For how long this journey be? I don't know.

LONELINESS IS THE ONLY REALITY I KNOW AT THIS TRYING TIMES.



-dyoyzee-