TIM SUNG KOO

A happy heart sings. So does an aching one. When it comes to feelings and songs, there seems to be an apparent association between the two. Maybe because they breed one another much alike the chicken and egg puzzle and which came first. I mean songs are borne by emotions that also bring one to sing. But any which way you put it, that association can not be denied. And that makes music one of the cheapest yet highly effective therapeutic tools (next to writing, of course)In fact, back in the practice, music appreciation and association is incorporated in the treatment sessions, that's what I know. Personally, I have been having a dose of music in every episode of my life, trying or otherwise. And as I approach my first quarter life assessment, I have had a song in every phase.-READ ON-

I am not ashamed to cry. And I have shed rivers to recount. Yes, I sobbed, for how many times I can't recall. The songs "For just a moment(love theme from St. Elmo's fire) by David Foster, "My immortal by Evanescence" & "The First time" from the movie "The Phantom of the Opera" tugged my heart. It captured all I wanted to say whenever I'm alone in pain and in the dark. On almost all occasions of salted pearls dropping, these 3 songs were there to air my feelings, to wail what my heart has been muted with, it's like wishing for an angel to come and wrap me in his arms. Of course, Nina's remake of songs really captures my taste in music. One of my friends even teases me when it comes to MP3s on my mobile phone. Nina's songs would be the 3/4 of my collection. I just love her songs actually and I like her a lot.

During the happy spike of my heart, I have songs of rejoicing too! Well, it has got to be RnB. I couldn't name one. It never fails to brighten my day. Songs by Cris Brown, Lady Gaga, BEP, Usher,Jason Derulo & so with Timbaland never fails to brighten my day. Hearing it readily snaps a grin on my face and it makes my body to dance and groove... I remember when I was in a dance troupe way back in my college years, it was easy for me to create or rehearse steps , gone are the days...lol!

As I jot down all the frustrations, anguish, angst, dreams and wishes on this blog, THE PRAYER by Josh Groban & Angie Stone, bellows to give me faith, it makes my day stride through with sufficient hope of good things to come my way. Several more days and I will be at another crossroad of this journey called LIFE. And in living, I will be singing more songs. But for now, these songs strum the strings of my heart.

Perhaps, this is yet an additional account to prove that music is indeed the language of the soul. And what the soul feels, only music can translate.



-dyoyzee-

aLOnE

I have known loneliness in the midst of a crowd of strangers and friends alike. It's a feeling that creeps into me even when I'm with the person I hold most important to. Loneliness leaves some memories that befriend some hopeful dreams I have. For a time, loneliness has been my sole companion. Loneliness...are you a friend or a foe? Are you with child of wisdom or my destruction it is that you seek? Why is happiness so evasive? Or has my heart become incapable of sowing its own joys. Is happiness a grace? A state of mind? An idealism or reality?

While I know that life cannot be all roses and thorns and thorns are necessary to further give meaning to its beauty, but still, why do life bring more rain than the warmth of the sun?

While my hopes hangs on the highest ideals and believe that the world abounds with reasons enough for events to be explained, why can't I have the simplest desire for a peaceful heart? Isn't in peace that people find consolation after seeing the tumultuous disparities in the world, the dreams that never came to be?

Yes, it is in peace that somehow the heart can be contented despite the scars? But I'm all wounds and the injuries go deeper. Why does man have to suffer? Loneliness, have you come to bring me closer to my faith or my doom? What do you have for me that may prune me...or you're a dagger for my soul?

My existence is filled with bitter-sweet memories, though I wasn't totally deprived of joy. But joy, as i have known it, rarely touches me...Oh, what should i do with thes troubled heart? I am carrying a heavy load with the feeling of guilt and emptiness. And I am running out of courage to face life. Should I?

Loneliness is a blank look in the face...a sad hello...a grief behind the smile...a pretended bravado in the eyes. It is the sting in my bosom, an eclipse hiding much of desires.Perhaps, it's a grace , or maybe a villain. For how long will I keep the heavy block? For how long this journey be? I don't know.

LONELINESS IS THE ONLY REALITY I KNOW AT THIS TRYING TIMES.



-dyoyzee-

PAIN

My thoughts reminisce last night's distinct - stirring - feelings I had. I poked a finger to the sky. My eyes in the darkness was excavated by the void, a pinhole in my heart was turning into chasm.I subscribed with the idea of blogging, and here's my first blog.
Some say that writing is the cheapest form of therapy.If that's the case, then, I've been in a therapy for the past 15 years or so. Now, whether or not it has done any good, it is yet to be answered.

Sometimes, when no one's there to give you support, you don't have a choice but to FACE it by yourself. and during those times , you feel as though you'd want to lock yourself in a closet just to deny the pain. Day by day, you live in a hell of loneliness and regret that you'd wanted to shout and let others share their sympathies to you. Yet, you hesitate, coz you don't want them seeing your pain and your sufferings.

-PAIN- damn the person who started it all. For he doesn't understand what pain is. But thanks to him, I am metamorphosed from a weakling to a better person. Sensitive yet strong, vulnerable yet determined.
I admire Bella Swan(Twilight Saga), she's like a child with a naive charm, when Jane told her "This may hurt a little" the excruciating pain being imposed to her was ineffectual.For solitude comes next after all these sufferings. It's the consolation of all agonies.

I do believe that God has reasons why I am into this situation now, and at the outset, the singular drive that is keeping me to hold on, spurring me to dream on is the idea that the sun will shine after this storm, then suddenly PAIN will cast away from me.(crossed fingers)

-dyoyzee-